If you’re still scarred by French Lesbianism because of all the spaghetti and scissoring of “Blue Is the Warmest Color,” mon petits choux, do I have the perfect salve for you. Granted, I’m not nearly the kind of person who goes around bragging about liking some artist before they were cool. I’ve never even claimed to be cool. But I do think French singer Héloïse Letissier, who goes by the stage name Christine and the Queens, is very, very cool. So cool, I actually am not sure if I’m allowed to write about her. I’m probably not cool enough.
But enough about my uncoolness, onto her infinite coolness. First and foremost, she is French, which always has that certain je ne sais quoi about it. Second, she is queer – describing herself in pansexual and possessing a post-gender swagger about her with a proven affinity for long hair, suits, tank tops and glitter. Third she just released her American self-titled debut and is touring the states. Fourth, all of her music videos are basically amazing, even if I don’t know what she is singing about half of the time. Fifth, she can dance, dammit. Sixth, but really, check out her dancing in those videos where she will remind you of a heavenly mashup of Michael Jackson, Fiest, Laurie Anderson and that one amazing modern dance recital you went to in college that totally blew your mind. And, finally, seventh, I really like her sound. Yes, all that and her music is good, too.
Drake’s dorky “Hotline Bling” dancing has nothing on Christine. Like, in this video she does nothing but sit in a folding chair (while crooning some choice Kanye West) and I was riveted the whole damn time.
So, anyway, to repeat: I am not cool, but big oui to this Christine and the Queens lady who most certainly is. Fin.